3 min read

Fears and freckles of March

I imagined writing to you from my vacation. I imagined typing something up on my last day, waiting for our flight at 11pm. I imagined putting all of March and what it brought into words on my first day back home.

But here I am, coughing and sneezing, feeling so shitty I don't know how I picked up my laptop. (For all I know, I feel like the shit right now – I missed writing so so much, you can't imagine what an energy boost I'm getting right now.)

Last month, I wrote about my 7 highs and lows from February. I found it such a soothing and warm experience – to celebrate myself and leave notes on improvement, instead of pushing to advance and set the goals immediately.

Today, it's time for thoughts on March.


My March 2024 recap:

1. We went to Sri Lanka! (I was thinking how else I could say it but nothing beats being straight-forward, eh?) Back in February, my mum and stepfather randomly called us and asked, "Would you like to join us for a trip to Sri Lanka?" My spontaneous Ukrainian soul had only one answer, "Hell yes." My Austrian husband took it in stride and went on planning our whole trip, just 3 weeks before the departure day.

2. The idea of this trip pushed my brain into overdrive – I felt incredibly anxious since it was my first trip ever out of Europe. Different climate, nature, culture: I had worries about everything, even days into our trip! Name a better way of robbing yourself of excitement, joy, and energy, right?

3. All to say... I saw my first two crocodiles! Okay, if you've ever been to Sri Lanka, you'd probably giggle at my nerve-wracking fear of crocodiles because of course, crocodiles don't wait for you in the alleys, ready to gobble you up – but try telling it to an anxious worrier. My fear of going for a river safari turned into one of the highlights of our trip. I'm so so incredibly proud of myself. (Wait for a story on that!)

4. Even before the trip, I was in a kind of writing slump. (During the trip, I wrote 0 essays, as you might have noticed.) The daily writing and publishing practice sometimes drained me – yet, after two-day breaks, I felt the most excitement to write. And even looking back at the days where I "pushed myself", I feel so much pride in a mere fact of writing and publishing, let alone reading what I came up with. It's a tricky balance to figure out – do you write every day, no matter how it feels to you in the moment because the big picture is worth it, or give yourself breaks here and there, to replenish yourself?

5. During the trip, I got a glimpse of an incredible routine – spending time with my mum and stepfather, exploring cities and everything curious around with my husband, reading in the pool by myself. Sounds perfect but also... it felt boring, too – and utterly unrealistic outside of this trip. And that's okay. I've been on the hunt for a "perfect routine" for years but maybe... there's no perfect routine, there's only something that works for you at that right moment. Just my two cents.

6. "Business anxiety" knocked on my doors, too. I keep telling myself that right now, I'm figuring things out: How I want to show up in my work and life, what kind of things to do, what kind of days to have. Yet it's inevitable that sometimes, there's a "What are you even doing with your time?" thought popping up.

7. I started working on my new offer, "personality unpacking", and my husband became my first client. This year I'm betting on my assumption that communicating and selling ideas for solopreneurs is easier and more effective when you have a clear narrative in your content and business while staying true to your character. In this spirit, I pulled some knowledge from the Ukrainian market and turned my brand strategy offer from something corporate-sounding and abstract – into a personality & expertise deep-dive that gives you a clear point of view to own and bet on as well as ideas to communicate it. (My husband, Jannis, did even a write-up after our workshop!)

8. In the whirlwind of travels and work, we made time for friends – went to a local drag show on 8 March and continued our cartoon nights with Christine. Making friends AND nurturing friendships is so bloody hard. Yet, I'm thankful that at this stage, we go for full-on emotional experiences with our friends. Singing "Vogue" at the top of our lungs, making it money-rain on drag artists? YES. Crying our hearts out for "Brother Bear" while eating chicken nuggets? YES YES YES.

9. I read 11 books. My top recommendation is "Three-Body Problem" by Cixin Liu – it's a mind-boggling sci-fi, with two sequels ("Dark Forest" and "Death's End"), and has been turned into a Netflix show (loved their take, watch it but enjoy while it lasts because who knows whether Netflix would film more...). Also, if you're a fan of Greek myths and badass women, "Clytemnestra" by Costanza Casati must be your next read.

10. Oh, I also got freckles. I never understood the hate on freckles – that's always been one of my favourite features about myself. And now, they are back – and I couldn't be happier. To your kind of beauty, forever and ever 🫶